Two summers from now: my first break

And now for my on time post. My girlfriend got sick but I seem to be safe. I've been taking preventative medicine, and going to bed early, and on the weekend, sleeping in. I am tired. I'm feeling a bit better today. I had a class that's part of an ongoing series yesterday, that would have taken up my whole afternoon from noon to 5 pm, but I started it, and just couldn't bring myself to finish it then. I needed a nap, which turned into watching some anime. I felt a little bad about it, but I also felt like I should be allowed at least a few hours of relaxation and recuperation time. The class was emotionally and mentally demanding, and I need a break, not further exhaustion. But now it's just one more thing I'm behind on. And there are so many of those now.

I'm trying to transcribe the recorded conversation I had with a teaching mentor. I had recorded it on a livescribe pen, which is a device created by the devil to inflict psychological agony. I have never come across a more infuriating and non-functional software interface for something. Perhaps I've come across something equally janky, but it was so long agony I don't remember it. I do not recommend them. I just need to get this recording transcribed so I can delete it and give it away to someone I don't like. (joking. except for the getting rid of it part.)

I haven't had lunch yet, it's 2:41. I should do that.
This would be really stressful, but my relationship is great and that provides a kind of psychological cushion. I have someone I can come back to and be held by, when I'm feeling overwhelmed. Just in general, it makes me happier, more energetic, more disciplined. Which is good, because I need it, with all that I'm doing.

It's kind of frustrating, how easily and quickly my desk gets over-run with stuff. I really want a system that keeps it generally clean, but I don't quite have it there yet, just like I don't quite have the rest of my stuff organized enough to put everything away easily, there keeps being all these things that just don't quite fit, that I don't immediately know what to do with, and so I have to sit down and ponderously decide where each things goes, rather than being able to mindlessly sort them quickly.

I could work on it and get better at it, but that itself takes time, which is precious and keeps being taken by fires that need to be put out immediately.

There is satisfaction in my job. Second year teaching is definitely less stressful than first year teaching, I feel like I have some ability to understand what is going on, what the kids and class need, and to adjust things to make it happen. But I don't yet have the systems in place to make it happen efficiently. I'm having to create all those systems, experimenting, learning, adjusting.

The weather is beautiful. There are wonderful friends around. I look forward, not to next summer, which will be just as busy as the previous two, but two summers from now, which will be the first time I can actually breath and get well and truly caught up on things. It feels kind of far away right now...