It’s Monday. It’s lunch time. Let’s do this.
Hello, what have I got to share today. Slowly but surely, I am working through the various beliefs and patterns around time management that have been a thorn in my side for a while. I’ve been focusing on it, and making. Well, I won’t say steady progress. Life’s been crazy the last… how long has it been? Year and a half? And longer. So I’ve had some learning streaks, and some times when I was just focusing on keeping my head above water. Working with my mentor now though, I feel like I am far enough out of the basic survival mode that I can put some energy back into improving a few aspects of my life. Though I’m trying to keep it narrow. I’ve heard and experienced that if you try and take on too many new habits, it hurts your success chances with all of them. Better to focus down on just a few manageable things, then expand when they are comfortably installed as habits.
Right now, my marching orders are clear: learning as much as I can from my mentor, and working on getting more…effective, with my time. I’ve got a little journal that I’ve used, first for trying to figure out what kind of organization system I want, then for trying to deal with the feeling of burnout and hopelessness I was feeling last year. I’d write thoughts and observations and findings I had, as I went through the process of fixing that element of my life. And eventually they were fixed to the point I wasn’t focusing on them. They were good enough. Now I add a third tab to that journal, “time management and prioritization.” The “prioritization” part is important. We all have limited time. We all have the same time, frankly. 24 hours per day. We can’t buy more of that. So how exactly do we “managed our time” more effectively?
As I put awareness on this, I’m noticing that a large part of what I’m doing wrong has to do with stuff I shouldn’t be doing. I remember someone saying we should have a “stop doing” list along with a “to do” list, and the idea makes sense, kind of. There are a lot of things I say yes to, that I should be saying no to. I’ve mentioned the idea of kon-Mari-ing my activities before, I think, but the point is really being driven home as I get more aware about how my time is being used. I’m not using it that badly. But it’s a matter of do I do something waaaaay down on my priority list, or do I do something that makes a real difference towards the goals and dreams and things that matter the most to me. The business term is stuff that ‘moves the needle.’ We’re talking about change, and creation. Is what you are doing moving you towards the changes and creations you value most? Often, it’s not. It’s stuff that is satisfying to do, but doesn’t really change anything. It gets done because it’s easier, or more pleasant, or quicker (or all of the above) than the actions that do/will move the needle.
Having the discipline, habits, tools, environment, to stay focused on those important things, at least most of the time, is where it’s at. There will always be chores, life-upkeep, etc., that requires some of your time, regularly, but I think the idea is to give that the time it deserves, but not more. And to work those around the often larger chunks of time you need to do the heavy lifting stuff that moves your dreams forwards.
That’s where I’m headed. I’ve finally gotten fed up with my number one enemy of meaningful work, my laptop. I’m working on how to implement some programs that will protect me from myself, via locking me out of certain distracting things, at the right times. I’ve already implemented a nightly 7:30 forced lock-out of basically everything on my laptop, and I love it. It feels freeing, rather than punishing, and I’m enjoying the additional time I get with my wife, and the fact that I’m not hyped up right before bed.
So, the experimenting continues.
My next item on the agenda, after I’ve worked with time some more, is to spend some time with self compassion, self confidence, and related things. Though I’ve gotten much better, I’m still sometimes prone to being hard on myself, and I own it to myself and everyone else who interacts with me, to be more self-compassionate. It makes me more effective in changing myself, and makes others happier to see me happier. And I my main spiritual teacher has said that happiness is one of the gates to self-realization, so it’s necessary. (How kind of the universe to design itself that way.)
Whoops, it’s time to go!
See ya next week!
I-o
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