My first week of practice teaching is done! One more to go. It's been quite fun. I love teaching. And I'm at the school, in the classroom, of the teacher who inspired me to take Montessori training in the first place, because of how amazing she was as a teacher. Her classroom management, the level of discipline she expects and instills, with love, is hard to believe. She's not tyrannical at all, but she has sky-high expectations for the students, and she doesn't compromise on anything. How she manages that... I want to learn. But she has the other skills to back it up: she's good at training other teachers and assistants, she knows how to structure classrooms and rules to create the atmosphere she wants, and she even teaches and instills positive values in the students, coaching them as complete humans, concerned not just for academics but all areas of their personality.
The most striking thing is how peaceful the classroom is. And how advanced the students are. Many (most?) are a grade level or two above where their age would indicate. They work with true, serious diligence. But they love it. They are curious, they love to be taught new things. Whatever school they go on to, they do well at. Many end up at the very top of their class, because the expectations they're held to here, the work ethic, is several steps above anything at other schools. But they have fun too. Last Friday was pajama day, and they got to read (which they love) and play games in the afternoon. Nobody is pushed beyond their limit, it's very carefully calculated, to be beyond their comfort zone, but within their capability. She keeps a careful eye and doesn't allow anyone to coast. But she also loves and respects them, and they know it. They are not afraid of her, they love to come to school. She often has a serious voice when they are doing something wrong, but she's never actually angry.
She runs a top notch elementary classroom, and she runs the school, and she never seems stressed out. The class functions well enough that she can get work done in the classroom. And the class is well behaved enough that she's not exhausted at the end of the day. If anything, that's the biggest miracle of all, since I've never taught anywhere or seen anywhere that felt like I wouldn't be exhausted at the end of the day. I'm not sure I would have believed it was possible, if I hadn't seen her class.
I recently picked up a magazine (a special edition of the harvard business review, on learning) that had an article about how to learn experts skills, and I'd like to apply that to her and her skills. I want to absorb them all like a sponge. Unfortunately, that's not what my assignment is about so I have to put that on the back burner, but it's been a fantasy of mine to have her as a mentor, since I met her. She's been willing to help me via telephone, but I've been so busy and exhausted with my job I haven't found much time to reach out, and there is something added to actually getting to be there, to observe and analyze first hand, that you can't get from a phone call.
In any case, I'm here now and it's great. It's much more fun than just observing, which is what I did last year.
OK, that's all for this week!
Sunday, December 15, 2019
The Global Unity Gathering in brief
I have two posts to write (last week and this week)n and some other correspondence, so these may be more short posts.
I'm considering switching platforms to something where comments actually are functional. currently it seems they don't work.
A lot has happened. I went to something called a "Global Unity Gathering" and met Sai Maa, an enlightened master, and devotee of Sai Baba, someone I feel a lot of connection to and respect for. She was fascinating. A great sense of humor, very down to earth and practical, and yet also very esoteric. There was a tremendous transformative energy around her and all she did, as well as the familiar reality and probability warping magical field I've felt around other great saints and holy places and just in general around places and people of power. And there was something about her that was totally indescribable. More than indescribably, beyond understanding. Some.... something, that I couldn't pin down. I've read and heard that it's futile to try and understand enlightened people, when you're not enlightened yourself. Perhaps this was part of the mystery that was being talked about. She was very much a person, she had an extremely strong and specific personality. Perhaps more of a personality than most people have. Like she was painted with brighter colors. At the same time, there was something...colorless. Something beyond the human personality, like the pivot around which the wheel of creation turns.
It gave me a sense of relief. I'd always worried that enlightenment meant you were just a non-responsible bliss lump, without any personality or fun to be had. But this person was clearly having tons of fun, and their personality wasn't erased in the slightest. It was if anything more clearly expressed. And yet there was also very clearly that...something...that was not personality, was not moved. It was kind of like a paradox: how can you have a personality and also be enlightened, beyond personality. It doesn't make logical sense. But you can see someone living it, and that experience provides the answer, where pure logic and reason cannot.
Like ... I think it was Einstein?... saying 'a problem is never solved from the same level of thinking that created the problem.
And, it is clear from how she talks and behaves, that enlightenment is not some kind of boring end of everything. You can continue to learn things, grow, help people. It's very much a relief. I don't know why she happened to be the one who demonstrated these things for me, I think that has more to do with me than her. I've interacted with some other people who I think are enlightened, but she specifically had been given the thumbs up by Sai Baba, who I particularly trust, for a bunch of reasons that I won't get into in this post (or perhaps ever, on this blog...) In any case, it's a relief.
More than that though, it was an amazing experience. I am an adherent to the "proof of the pudding is in the tasting" philosophy. Test things and people out for yourself, rather than just taking other people's words for it. And I got to do that at this gathering, and my experience was remarkable. The energy and clarity and vitality I felt, a few days into the gathering, was top notch powerful and transformative, and one experience near the end, was one of those rare, heart opening, tears streaming down in gratitude and love spiritual experiences that always seem to be related to
God and devotion and growing tangibly closer to God. Or more accurately, becoming aware of God's closeness and love. I can count on one hand the number of times I've had experiences like that. I can describe them all in detail, because they are indelibly etched into my heart.
So, good times. Oh, and I met some wonderful people there. I shared a room with one guy who was a long-time devotee, and who had some fascinating stories to share. Some little miraculous syncronicitys occurred with him as well, but I'm out of time. You'll just have to ask be about them in person if you want to know ;D
I'm considering switching platforms to something where comments actually are functional. currently it seems they don't work.
A lot has happened. I went to something called a "Global Unity Gathering" and met Sai Maa, an enlightened master, and devotee of Sai Baba, someone I feel a lot of connection to and respect for. She was fascinating. A great sense of humor, very down to earth and practical, and yet also very esoteric. There was a tremendous transformative energy around her and all she did, as well as the familiar reality and probability warping magical field I've felt around other great saints and holy places and just in general around places and people of power. And there was something about her that was totally indescribable. More than indescribably, beyond understanding. Some.... something, that I couldn't pin down. I've read and heard that it's futile to try and understand enlightened people, when you're not enlightened yourself. Perhaps this was part of the mystery that was being talked about. She was very much a person, she had an extremely strong and specific personality. Perhaps more of a personality than most people have. Like she was painted with brighter colors. At the same time, there was something...colorless. Something beyond the human personality, like the pivot around which the wheel of creation turns.
It gave me a sense of relief. I'd always worried that enlightenment meant you were just a non-responsible bliss lump, without any personality or fun to be had. But this person was clearly having tons of fun, and their personality wasn't erased in the slightest. It was if anything more clearly expressed. And yet there was also very clearly that...something...that was not personality, was not moved. It was kind of like a paradox: how can you have a personality and also be enlightened, beyond personality. It doesn't make logical sense. But you can see someone living it, and that experience provides the answer, where pure logic and reason cannot.
Like ... I think it was Einstein?... saying 'a problem is never solved from the same level of thinking that created the problem.
And, it is clear from how she talks and behaves, that enlightenment is not some kind of boring end of everything. You can continue to learn things, grow, help people. It's very much a relief. I don't know why she happened to be the one who demonstrated these things for me, I think that has more to do with me than her. I've interacted with some other people who I think are enlightened, but she specifically had been given the thumbs up by Sai Baba, who I particularly trust, for a bunch of reasons that I won't get into in this post (or perhaps ever, on this blog...) In any case, it's a relief.
More than that though, it was an amazing experience. I am an adherent to the "proof of the pudding is in the tasting" philosophy. Test things and people out for yourself, rather than just taking other people's words for it. And I got to do that at this gathering, and my experience was remarkable. The energy and clarity and vitality I felt, a few days into the gathering, was top notch powerful and transformative, and one experience near the end, was one of those rare, heart opening, tears streaming down in gratitude and love spiritual experiences that always seem to be related to
God and devotion and growing tangibly closer to God. Or more accurately, becoming aware of God's closeness and love. I can count on one hand the number of times I've had experiences like that. I can describe them all in detail, because they are indelibly etched into my heart.
So, good times. Oh, and I met some wonderful people there. I shared a room with one guy who was a long-time devotee, and who had some fascinating stories to share. Some little miraculous syncronicitys occurred with him as well, but I'm out of time. You'll just have to ask be about them in person if you want to know ;D
Sunday, December 1, 2019
The quiet voice within
OK, I'm on a role with small tasks that need doing. I've got one more big one that I'd like to do today, but I'm not sure it's actually going to happen.
I was recently hit again with the fact of my own mortality. Someone I love... actually, now that I think about it, two people I care about, have cancer that has a scary prognosis. I hugged one recently and they said, "treasure every day." Anyone can say that, but it hit especially hard, coming from them. We should all, always, be treasuring every day. There's not good reason not to. It doesn't cost you anything but awareness. But it is so easy to grow complacent while the sand in our hourglass slips away, never to return. Especially when we think we have a lot left. It can be a useful thought experiment to step into the viewpoint of someone who thinks they might not have much left.
What's really important to you? What is the good life, as Aristotle might have said. I have part of an answer, for myself. In spirituality I found an answer that satisfies me. God realization, Self realization, as the ultimate goal of human birth. I think, if I'm striving for that every day, I'm doing alright. But what does that mean? That's the part that so many people argue about. And that everyone has to find an answer for themselves, or else be ever uncomfortable, since other people's answers will end up chafing like clothes of the wrong size. What's good for one person may not be good for another. It's your own inner voice of truth that is the only truly satisfying one to listen to. Sometimes others will say things that remind you of what your own inner voice is quietly saying, but ultimately it's you who feels good about what you're doing or not.
I'm trying to live with truth, with love, and with a bit of play and laughter as well. I'm trying to do what is right, for my position in the world. Playing my part in the grand drama/comedy of life.
But it's easy to forget to even check in with yourself, about what your own quiet voice of rightness is saying to you. Sometimes, I even find it a little frightening, the thought of looking, maybe finding that the right action is something I don't want to do, because it's scary or uncomfortable or difficult. But ultimately, it has always been massively for my best and the best of all involved, as far as my limited ability to perceive is concerned, when I follow that inner voice to a tee. I've been trying to remember that, as of late, but it is so easy to forget, with all the distractions of the world constantly going on. With exhaustion, and the demands of work etc., to take that moment to stop, get quiet, and ask my inner voice of wisdom, "what should I be doing now?" (and then wait for an answer)
Oh, and sometimes there is no answer, it seems. Or put another way, the answer is, "you could do lots of different things, you choose what you want to do, and I'll let you know if that's ok." Rather than "here is the one pathway that is ok to take."
This is not a magical predictive voice of prognostication, it's just... you could probably simply call it your conscience. The feeling of what is right and wrong, devoid of outside ideas about right and wrong that other people have tried to put onto you.
When I ask my students, "is that a good thing to do?" they almost always know the answer, even though they may not be listening to it. If even little children have this faculty, one could assume adults do as well, though it may have gotten covered over with the over-thinking complexities of adult-hood. or atrophied through disuse. Sometimes we get good at lying to ourselves or justifying our actions, and we drown out that quiet voice, but it's still there, available if we choose to listen.
Live wisely, live well
With love,
Isaac
I was recently hit again with the fact of my own mortality. Someone I love... actually, now that I think about it, two people I care about, have cancer that has a scary prognosis. I hugged one recently and they said, "treasure every day." Anyone can say that, but it hit especially hard, coming from them. We should all, always, be treasuring every day. There's not good reason not to. It doesn't cost you anything but awareness. But it is so easy to grow complacent while the sand in our hourglass slips away, never to return. Especially when we think we have a lot left. It can be a useful thought experiment to step into the viewpoint of someone who thinks they might not have much left.
What's really important to you? What is the good life, as Aristotle might have said. I have part of an answer, for myself. In spirituality I found an answer that satisfies me. God realization, Self realization, as the ultimate goal of human birth. I think, if I'm striving for that every day, I'm doing alright. But what does that mean? That's the part that so many people argue about. And that everyone has to find an answer for themselves, or else be ever uncomfortable, since other people's answers will end up chafing like clothes of the wrong size. What's good for one person may not be good for another. It's your own inner voice of truth that is the only truly satisfying one to listen to. Sometimes others will say things that remind you of what your own inner voice is quietly saying, but ultimately it's you who feels good about what you're doing or not.
I'm trying to live with truth, with love, and with a bit of play and laughter as well. I'm trying to do what is right, for my position in the world. Playing my part in the grand drama/comedy of life.
But it's easy to forget to even check in with yourself, about what your own quiet voice of rightness is saying to you. Sometimes, I even find it a little frightening, the thought of looking, maybe finding that the right action is something I don't want to do, because it's scary or uncomfortable or difficult. But ultimately, it has always been massively for my best and the best of all involved, as far as my limited ability to perceive is concerned, when I follow that inner voice to a tee. I've been trying to remember that, as of late, but it is so easy to forget, with all the distractions of the world constantly going on. With exhaustion, and the demands of work etc., to take that moment to stop, get quiet, and ask my inner voice of wisdom, "what should I be doing now?" (and then wait for an answer)
Oh, and sometimes there is no answer, it seems. Or put another way, the answer is, "you could do lots of different things, you choose what you want to do, and I'll let you know if that's ok." Rather than "here is the one pathway that is ok to take."
This is not a magical predictive voice of prognostication, it's just... you could probably simply call it your conscience. The feeling of what is right and wrong, devoid of outside ideas about right and wrong that other people have tried to put onto you.
When I ask my students, "is that a good thing to do?" they almost always know the answer, even though they may not be listening to it. If even little children have this faculty, one could assume adults do as well, though it may have gotten covered over with the over-thinking complexities of adult-hood. or atrophied through disuse. Sometimes we get good at lying to ourselves or justifying our actions, and we drown out that quiet voice, but it's still there, available if we choose to listen.
Live wisely, live well
With love,
Isaac
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