Desire for communal grooming, Fear of pizza the hut, and Victory

I have just finished the first and probably smallest of my four main assignments due Thursday (and Friday, I suppose, but I have class Thursday, so I won't have much time to work on them.

Anyways, I just wanted to say:
https://youtu.be/4n0fcGEI_aE

(or for those of you who didn't watch:)

YATTA!

(which means roughly "I did it! Woo!")


Well, I still have to go over it for editing. But it feels quite done. One load off my mind, and now I can focus on the others. And the biggest project is off my mind, not because I'm done, but because I ain't doing any more on it until I finish the other smaller projects, so I'm resigned to asking for an extension for that. So I've got a big presentation to prepare for class, a small presentation to prepare for class, and a medium sized project to complete. Oh, and another large project that I'm also resigned to asking for an extension for.

But I feel quite good, actually. I've been working diligently, for more than a week. Not straining, taking breaks when I need then to keep from going mushy in the brain, but working hard, and it feels good.

I'm dreading break, in a way, because, after I finish all the stuff I'm going to have to get extensions on, the pressure's going to be off, and I might just blob out into a Jabba the Hut kind of creature until school starts again.



I've got to figure out how to keep some pressure on, perhaps with some goals? Oh, I'll take a break, don't worry, but a day or three should be good. Maybe I'll take it easy-er. But I'm discovering that I like focused, intense, but balanced work. And I seem pretty good at not going too hard, sat least lately. Slow and steady.

I would love to see my Fairfield friends. I miss youuuuuuuu. But it's a two-day drive both ways... And if I've only got a week off...

Oh, yeah, about that: technically school doesn't start till mid-January, but it's been recommended to start my internship as soon as elementary school starts, since that will mean I get to end the internship sooner, and that is really good news, as there will be all sorts of end-of-term assignments coming due, and it would be good to have the rest of the week free to do them, as I'm doing now. That would be the smart move.

Though, I may have to wait anyways, depending on how long my background check takes. Oh, I guess that's news too. Unless you're a teacher, then you already know: in order to teach, you need a background check (at least in a public school, I don't know how private schools work.) I went in and got my fingerprints done yesterday. It was cool. No ink anymore, it's all digital.


I think I need more human contact. I was really enjoying having the person holding my fingers down to the machine. Just having someone hold my hand. As a kind of reserved guy, I don't really see a good way to get regular, non-awkward hugs where I'm living. My monkey brain craves communal grooming.

Maybe I should ask my classmates if they want to take turns doing lice checks as an excuse for some platonic physical contact. Teachers are all about lice checks, right? My common sense meter is telling me this is well into the "weird" zone. Probably just weird enough to get a laugh, and have people think I'm joking. Am I joking? I do think it's funny. But I'd also be totally into doing it, and would prefer that outcome, weird as it may be.

I just read somewhere that loneliness was worse for your health than smoking. SMOKING! Let's see if I can quickly find the article...
Yup, there's a bunch, here's one, http://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/about-loneliness/

Loneliness is worse for you than obesity, and about the same as 15 cigarettes a day, apparently.
This is why I'm considering living in Fairfield IA, despite the fact that I'm a nature nut and Iowa has the least wildland of any US state, if I'm remembering my facts correctly. Your peeps are really important to your mental and physical wellbeing. I do ok, when I'm not cramming for my final weeks of the semester, but I've got to work to keep in touch. I'd really prefer to have a nice social support network right next to me.

Thoughts floating in my head for the future. For now, I'm just impressed that I'm soldiering along, despite that.

But I predict THAT rubber band is the one that's going to snap back hardest, as soon as the pressure of all these assignments is off. And that's the place I'm going to let myself indulge over break. If I can. Phone conversations are way better than nothing, but they are poor substitutes for living next door. Or even better, in the same building.

Welp, I've got a schedule to keep. Tomorrow's going to be a big day of cardboard cut-outs for presenting, until I can actually finish making the real things. I feel like it's a giant cardboard cut out of a house, that I'm going to show to everybody, with the real house behind it still missing some rooms, it's roof, and a paint job.