The previous blog post was for last week. This is for this week.
I'm about to go back to work. The 'Sunday night blues' that I often get, when the weekend is almost over, seems to be intensified relative to the amount of time off that I get, so it is more than usual this time, as I've been off for 2 weeks. Yay for then! But now I am back, and with it comes the crushing weight of all the stuff I want to do and don't have time for, and won't have time for, and the feeling of being unprepared, always rushed and behind, with never enough time to catch my breath and plan strategically in a way that would eventually pull me out of this hole.
I'll figure it out eventually like I always do, but it might just involve eventually switching to a part time job, rather that the internal changing and healing of negative beliefs, which is what I'm working on now, because it's the main thing I can clearly do something about. Or who knows, maybe I'll figure it out and be feeling good about my time and productivity just from that internal work.
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Let's see, other representative tidbits...
One of the cats has unsettling bald patches on her ears and nose. It happens every summer but is particularly evident this time. Is it a disease? getting into fights only during the summer? hair loss from it getting warmer? I don't know, but she's very dear to me, so I do worry.
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The garden is beautiful. If I had a lot of spare time, I'd take some pictures of it. Full of flowers and veggies ^_^
And some hornworms, which can get gigantic.
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I wonder what the summer session at work is going to look like, feel like? Will I be with my mentor, or another assistant? Will I know what to do, or be thrown in, sink or swim? I'll find out tomorrow!
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I discovered that the History Channel show "Alone" currently has one of my instructors from Tom Brown's school, as a contestant. I can't wait to find out how he did, and what he did. His name is Matt, if your looking.
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My vacation was very nice. I got to see and play with or walk and chat with some of my favorite friends and mentors. And I got to spend a few days at the beach, (somewhere South Texas) just having fun with Suzannah. Very nice. Though it was hard not to get heat stroke, with the intense humidity and sun.
The last three days have mostly been working furiously, trying to get current with my obligation tracking system and inboxes, and just today trying to get some of the things on my to do list, done.
I think a lot of the problem with the system I'm using is that, when it has enough time put into it, it works great, saves time, and increases creativity, and reduces stress. But especially at first, it requires a lot of time put into it. I don't have a lot of time, and so it's a bit like trying to get paper burning by putting it in the oven and setting it to 350 degrees. You need... what was the book called, fahrenheit 451, to get paper burning. I think it's called activation energy in chemistry. Anything less, and not much happens. I don't think that's quite true here, I think it's better than nothing, but not that much better. The paper is smouldering at least.
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OK, back to work, though I really want to watch more of that "Alone" show since I looked at it. :D
-I Out
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